leaving the US tomorrow

We leave the United States tomorrow and head to Ukraine! It is so hard to believe that it is time to finally take the big trip across the ocean. I don't have time to write about all the thoughts and feelings going through me right now (more packing to do), but please continue to pray for us, our appointment, our team in Ukraine, and for all those we with which we come into contact. I'll update as soon as possible...until then, good-bye!

Staci

13 days and counting

We only have 13 days until our SDA appointment! So far I am not freaking out, but I am crazy-stressed and busy. I am not sure that I have gotten to bed before 12:30am so far this week. It doesn't look like it is going to happen tonight either (I guess that I could be working on items instead of blogging, but oh well).

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I am hoping to get a lot done this weekend since we both have Friday off work. I would love to get his room completely finished. And what I mean by "finished" is started and finished. The bed needs to be put together, pictures hung, curtains/blinds purchased and hung, decorated, etc. So really nothing to do :) Also throw in packing for the trip, getting things at work taken care of so I can be gone, getting things at home taken care of, regular day-to-day stuff like laundry, bills, etc and there is no time for relaxing (or even sleeping for that matter).

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I am going to go get a few things done before heading off to bed. I just wanted to let everyone know that we hadn't fallen off the face of the earth. Please continue to pray for our appointment and that our hearts would be open for whatever child God has in store for us. Thank you!

Staci

Expectations

We have three and a half weeks until we leave - talk about surreal!! It seems like this is something that we have been waiting on forever, and I am so thankful that it is all coming true!!!

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Since we are "expecting" (though not in the traditional birth way), I have always thought about what our son will be like, as I imagine most parents-to-be do. Since we have been in this process for about 18 months, my expectations and ideas have changed. It's so funny, our son in my mind has gotten older as we have waited for him to arrive. I never expected that he would age in my mind as we went through the process! When we started the whole process, I was sure that our son had to be 18 months old (at most), but now he is at least three or four years old in my mind. Anyone else have their child age in their mind as they waited?

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We have started updating all our dossier documents for travel. We are getting three copies of each document in the chance we decide to adopt two children. I am hoping to get everything gathered in the next week or so to give us time to get to the Secretary of State's office in Columbus a few weeks before we leave. I just want to be sure that we don't have any paperwork "snafus" before leaving. Of course that means that if it is not the paperwork, then it will be something else...such is life :)

please pray for the Chapman family

Please pray for the family of Christian singer Steven Curtis Chapman. They family lost their daughter/sister Maria in a tragic accident. The brother especially needs to be wrapped in prayer. Visit http://www.stevencurtischapman.com/ for more information.

a home has been purchased

We FINALLY found a place to call home! Good thing too because we have to be out of our house in less than a month! It is pretty much everything that we wanted - even a fenced yard for the dogs!! It is not a ranch like we wanted, but it is a nice tri-level. We are very excited about this house - it will be a great place to bring our son home to! It is very close to a couple of our close friends, but only 30 minutes away from where we currently live. We will both be closer to work, which will really save on gas money!!

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Now that the house has been purchased, I need to focus again on getting our dossier updated for travel. We have our fingerprinting redone tomorrow morning at the USCIS Department, so I have at least gotten that scheduled in the chaos! I plan on taking one updated copy for the facilitator, and one for us if needed. What are some other documents that we might be asked for by a judge? I almost forgot about copies of tax returns.

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Staci

what's in a name?

Thursday night Damon and I went to dinner at our favorite local Mexican restaurant. Every time that we go, we talk about visiting our friends who are missionaries in Puebla, and Damon is ready to go back to visit. Well...as we are eating our chips and salsa, Damon said "I can't wait to go to Mexico with Trent." I said "who?" and Damon replied (in a sarcastic tone) "our son."

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Now I don't know if I've talked about this before, but it took us a LONG time to agree on names for our children (as we plan on changing their first names). I can assure you though, the boy's name we agreed on was not Trent (short for Trenton), even though that was one of the two finalists. So apparently I have been telling people that we are naming our son Wesley, while Damon has been telling people we are naming him Trenton. So I guess we need to decide on a name (again). It's pretty funny though because I thought that was one of the things we had "nailed down" in the large amount of unknowns in international adoption :)

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In news entirely unrelated, we have accepted an offer on our home! I realize that our home has been for sale for about 2 months now, but I never seriously considered the fact that it might sell and we would have to move! (Sometimes I just don't think things through...) I don't mean to sound like such an airhead, but I didn't think the house was likely to sell based on market conditions.

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I am actually pretty sad about leaving this house. It was our first home together, and it is finally the way we always wanted it to look!! If I am totally honest though, I am afraid of change. I feel like we are changing our lives so much with the adoption, and I feel overwhelmed as it is. I guess I should have thought of that before we put the house on the market :)

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So we have to begin searching for a new home to move into before we leave for our appointment in 73 days. We have to be out of our house by June 15th, so we have some work to do! Better get back to house-hunting on the internet. How did people do it before?

Staci

changes in UA adoption

Things with adoption in Ukraine right now are up in the air for some people. Rumor has it that a law has been passed preventing singles from adopting and married couples from adopting a child more than 45 years younger than the oldest parent. As far as I can tell, nothing has been confirmed yet. I know that some people say that it has passed, but since Cathy Harris hasn't confirmed it, I highly doubt these other people know more than she would know! So until I receive word from Cathy, I do choose not to believe the rumors.

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Please pray for all those already in the process (especially my friend Kendall - her blog is listed to the right) and for all the children who may not end up with a forever home. It breaks my heart to think of all the children who might not receive a better life outside of the orphanage!!

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We have booked our flight to Kyiv in July! Every time we get a little bit closer in the process, I think "wow - we are really doing this." I don't think that because I have changed my mind - it's just that this is something I have wanted to do for so long that I have trouble believing that my dreams are coming true (becoming a Mom and adopting a child).

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I have been emailing every day to Vicki. She and her husband have an appointment the same day as we do. It's great to share information with someone who is at the same step in the process as you are.

OUR APPOINTMENT DATE!

We received word from our facilitator that our appointment date is the middle of July!! 3 months to go and so much to do...better get started! :)

day 10 of our "20" day wait

We are on business day 10 of the "20" day wait to hear our appointment date. I put the 20 in quotes because it is unlikely that we will find out by the 20th day. That is okay though - I am used to waiting. Don't you usually have to wait for the best things in life?

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Why is it that I am just not motivated to start getting things done? I am traditionally no a procrastinator, but during the adoption process I have started that bad habit!! I need to schedule our immunizations, update paperwork for our travel, start a personal packing list (from suggestions of others), finish the child's room, train a coworker to do my job when I am out of the country, weed my flowerbeds (not adoption-related), and so on...

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Since I have at least done a little bit for the room, I will post a picture of the quilt we purchased. We love dogs, so that's the theme we picked for the room. Isn't it adorable??? I still need curtains, and we have to put the bed together. I have just a trundle bed in there now since I didn't want to put the big bed together in case we had to move.

WE ARE SUBMITTED!

We received word this weekend that our dossier has been submitted. YAY!! Now we are in the waiting period to find out when our appointment will be. From others that have been submitted this year, I assume that our appointment will be around mid to late July at the earliest. So I guess we'll be there for the warm, sticky summer months with the bugs and everything...believe me - I am not complaining though!! I am so thankful that we will be given a chance to travel to find our son!!

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We had an open house yesterday with a limited turnout of only 6 couples. The only complaint was the hill in the backyard, so that is encouraging. No offers though, but we're optimistic that one will come. If it doesn't though, we wait until next spring to try again. Damon really wants to get it done now, where it doesn't matter as much to me. I just worry about taking on too much before the adoption.

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I am again fighting an upper respiratory/sinus infection. This is the third one since Christmas, and it is getting old! What is bothering me now is the deep chest cough. It is bothering Damon too since I am keeping him up at night :) I think I am going to head off to bed now to see if I can get some rest!

waiting for the submission news

I haven't heard anything to the contrary, so we assume that our dossier has been submitted. I am sure it has been, but I will feel much better once we get official word from our facilitator. I have been told that she is unable to email right now, so that's the reason for the silence.

I'll let you know for sure soon...hopefully :)

No word as of yet...

I haven't received an email from our faclitator yet!! I am sure that everything is fine, but I am running through all the various things that could have gone wrong with the submission in my head...I am making myself get off the computer because I keep hitting "send and receive" on my email every five seconds (andyes, I know what time it is in Ukraine right now (around 2:00a), but maybe the email is delayed). I will post if I hear anything later...

4 days to submission...

I cannot believe that we only have 4 days until out dossier is submitted!! It feels surreal, and I am trying not to get my hopes up too high in case something happens. I really have no idea what could happen, but in the event that something does happen I will be a little better prepared. Our facilitator says that we have everything ready to go, so I trust her.

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I have decided that I better get my behind in gear...I was so gung-ho reading books, doing research, and preparing when we first starting this adoption journey, but in the last six months I have slacked off. I am not sure if it is because I was upset at how slowly it felt like things were going or what, but I have been trying to motivate myself! The good news though is that in the last six months I have been very diligent in saving money. I really wish I had been this attentive to our money for the past 5 years! I cannot imagine the amount we would have in savings now! I guess it is best not to think about it :(

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Our house is also for sale right now. We are trying to move before the adoption because once we get home, we won't move for a while to create stability for our child(ren). I feel like we haven't had enough interest in it, but the weather here in Ohio recently probably has something to do with it. We had a blizzard two weekends ago and since then it has been raining almost nonstop. I am happy to report though that today was a beautiful sunny day! It's amazing how much better you feel when the sun is shining :) Hopefully things pick up in the housing market, but if not, then we won't move. We are really looking to move to be closer to our jobs. We both drive at least 25 minutes to get to work, and we would like to be able to spend that time at home rather than on the road. We'll see what happens.

Here is Duke staring out at the snow from last weekend. I had to shovel the back porch so the dogs could get outside. And yes...Duke is wearing a sweater because he was spending so much time outside that I was worried about him getting too cold!

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What else to talk about...I am super-psyched for the Celebrity Apprentice tonight! I am a country music fan, so I am excited that Trace Adkins is doing so well! I think he and Piers Morgan will be the two facing off for the finale. I think Trace will win though!

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So apparently the basketball season is wrapping up because Damon had me fill out a basketball pool. He knows that I don't even like basketball, but he wants me to pick these teams that I know NOTHING about. Then as I pick teams for various reasons (like the fact that I like the name of the school), he makes fun of me! What is that about? then as I have done for the past five years, I pick Duke to win it all. I pick them because that is the name of one of our dogs, even though he is not named after the school. One of these days they are going to win, and thus I will finish somewhere above the bottom three in a pool...

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Our niece Julie got married last weekend to Isaac. It was a very nice ceremony and reception. Damon walked her down the aisle since her father passed away about 18 months ago, so that was nice. Here are a few pictures from the happy day

Mom doing well

Thanks so much for your prayers! The surgery went well, and the doctor also ended up fixing two hernias he found! Mom is pretty worn out as of now, but she is looking much better than she did after the surgery. She will be in the hospital for another day or two, but I am leaving Cleveland late this afternoon.

I just found out this morning that one of my best friends brothers has come down with a bad case of pancreatitis. The family is all down there now, so please pray that he recovers quickly. I think he might be getting married soon...

Damon is in Columbus right now apostilling the last of our documents to update before submission! We will have to update others, but we can do that before traveling. WOW! Hard to believe that it is only about a month until our dossier is submitted! In some ways it seems like forever since we started the adoption process, but in other ways it seems like it has gone fast. (I am sure that sounds a little convoluted)

Thank you so much for those praying - it means a lot to me and my family!
Staci

asking for prayer

I am not sure how many blog readers are there pray, but if you do, I ask you to pray for my mother who is having surgery Thursday morning at Cleveland Clinic. Right now things don't look great, but of course they could always be worse!! My mom is an amazingly strong woman and I am confident she will get through the surgery without complications, but we aren't sure until the surgery what will have to be done afterwards or the extent of the problems.

So please pray for her, my dad, and the whole family. I'll update once the surgery is over.
Thank you!!

random thoughts

I have been meaning to post more often than I have, but somehow I just haven't gotten around to it. I have been trying to read a few Ukrainian adopter blogs and give comments. I always like to get them (hint, hint), so I try and offer a word of encouragement to let them know someone is out there reading their posts.

Has anyone else had this sinus mess going around? I got it the week before Christmas and I am STILL trying to get rid of it. Unfortunately mine is not the head congestion stuff, but rather it has settled in my chest and I just can't get rid of it!! YUCK! I missed three days of work last week, so I hate to think of all I have to do when I get back!!

I don't know if anyone out in cyberspace reading this is near Cincinnati Children's Hospital, but they are offering what I would consider to be a good class coming up. It is called "everything you ever wanted to know about international adoption...now you can ask." At first I thought it sounded like it was about the process of adopting, but it isn't that at all. The classes are on Saturdays from 10a-12p as follows:

02/23/08 - attachment issues

03/01/08 - now that you are home

03/08/08 - expect the unexpected

03/15/08 - mystery history

The woman teaching it is a psychotherapist and an adoptive parent herself. She spoke at the other adoption classes offered at CCHMC, and Damon and I were impressed by her.

We have a few papers that we have to send over to Ukraine before our paperwork is submitted because they expire on March 10th (10 days before our submission date). I am normally not very pleased when we have to redo the paperwork (yet again), but since we have a date to be submitted somehow I don't mind :) Fancy that...

Damon has also decided that now is the time to sell our house. I am not against selling our house at all, but I just think of all the things we have to do before that can happen! And with the housing market being so poor right now, will we have time to sell ours and buy another before traveling to Ukraine? The thought just stresses me out a LITTLE bit...

Since I have been trying to organize our pictures on the computer, I thought I would post a few that make me smile

This is our dog Duke when we had a snowstorm three years ago. How cute is he in his little coat? (Yes, we will dress our dogs in coats or sweaters when it is cold outside, but Duke doesn't usually get one put on because he doesn't get cold like Katie)

This is Damon on our honeymoon in Hawaii. He did not think that he needed suncreen as we drove in a convertible through Volcano National Park for at least three hours. Since he was wrong, he had to use aloe vera gel as hair gel for a day or two.

This was on our trip to Mexico in the spring of 2006. We went to visit our friends Joe and Jenna who are serving as missionairies there. The purple flowers are a bouganvilia plant that has to hundreds of years old. I posted the picture with Damon and Joe in front so you could see just how large the plant really is! Isn't it gorgeous??

I had to change the colors because I am having trouble getting this to look like I want it to. Does anyone else have this trouble? Every paragraph runs together, so I changed the colors to differentiate the paragraphs. I am not usually technically challenged...

Dossier Submission Date - March 24

We just received word from our facilitator and translator that our dossier will be submitted on March 24th!!! That is two months, one week and four days - not that I am counting or anything :) We do have to update a few documents as the expire on March 10th, but I don't care at all!! So much stuff to get ready...now I am starting to get nervous (and excited of course). I just cannot stop smiling!!! YAY!! We want to thank everyone for their thoughts and prayers. This has been a hard road so far and it isn't going to get easier for us, but we know this is what we are supposed to be doing right now.

Love - Staci and Damon

Happy New Year

Happy New Year everyone! It's hard to believe that Christmas is over, and we're already into January. We had a great Christmas - spent a lot of time with our families! My Grandparents were in from Florida, and I was happy to see them since we only see them twice a year. The weekend before Christmas, we went to Bowling Green, and we spent Christmas day with both of our families. It was also nice to be off work so much! But now we're back to work until Martin Luther King Jr. Day (you know how many holidays government workers get :).

I haven't written in a while, but the holidays as a whole bummed me out pretty bad and I have been battling a sinus problem (yuck!). I just really thought that we would travel and be home by Christmas, and when I realized that wasn't going to happen, I got depressed. I just didn't expect to be as upset about the delay as I was, so that hit hard.

I have been feeling better though. Word has it that the "quota system" for Ukraine has been abolished :) YAY!! We received an email in early December that said that only 32 American families could adopt children under six years old, and 92 families could adopt two or more children with one of the children under six years old. Apparently those limits are not going to be enforced for 2008, so that makes us very happy (for ourselves and all the children waiting for forever families)!!

I am not sure how things will be handled now regarding dossier submission since some people have been waiting "in line" for a while. We are hopeful that our adoption will be complete this year. If not, then we know God has a reason (but I'm just really hoping he doesn't have a reason).

Take care!

not much going on

I haven't posted in a LONG time, but other than work, nothing much has been going on. We are still waiting on our dossier to be submitted. Word has been going around that the yearly quota of American dossiers has been met for 2007, but I haven't seen anything that proves the rumor is true. So until then, we are holding out hope. If it turns out to be true, then we'll have to roll with the punches :) Obviously we want to travel as soon as possible, and we know that we'll be travelling when we are supposed to travel. It is difficult to keep your spirits up, but we are doing the best we can!

Work has been going well - it's busy, so that helps keep my mind off things regarding the adoption. I am working on the 2008 budget right now, and that's quite a challenge!

We have been getting the child's room ready. I am so excited to see it all come together. The bedding is dogs, so that's the theme we're going with. I saw the bedding on amazon and just fell in love with it!

The dogs are doing well. Yesterday afternoon Katie ripped out her toenail at the base. Talk about a mess!! She tracked blood all through the house, but I think it is all cleaned up now. I took her to the vet this morning, and they said she'll be fine with an antibiotic.

We'll keep you up-to-date if we hear any news (good or bad)...

become an m&m...

Have you seen this website? http://www.becomeanmm.com/ You can design an m&m to look like you.

Here is Damon and me walking down the road...

Here we are in front of our house...

Seriously, I can't stop!!

no news

I haven't posted in a while, but there hasn't really been anything to report. We are waiting for our dossier to be submitted, and I have begun to accet the fact that it will probably be next year before we can travel. We have started getting his room ready though, so I'll post pictures when we get a bed. (I have been having trouble making a decision!) We have already received the bedding though, and it is adorable!! The theme of the room is...DOGS! We love dogs, so we figured, why not? I just hope that our son isn't afraid of dogs...

We found out recently that the trip to Ukraine will probably take a couple weeks longer than originally thought. The issuance of a Ukrainian passport for our son will take an additional ten business days!!!! This is in addition to the required ten day wait after the adoption has been finalized!!

Dealing with the uncertainty in adoption is the hardest part! We don't know when we'll be traveling, how long we will be gone, how our employers are going to react to us being gone, how the dogs will react to us being gone and coming home with a child, how we will adjust to being parents, on and on...Now I am starting to stress myself out!!

Here is a picture of my high school girlfriends...actually I shouldn't say that they are my high school girlfriends because they are still some of the best friends a girl could ever have!!

happy 4th of july (almost)

It's almost Independence Day here in the United States, so we'll be going to see fireworks at our friend's house. Never fear - we aren't setting them off, but we are watching local fireworks from their house!! I don't want to be near anyone setting off fireworks!!!

Check out this video about Russian orphanages doing "portage" with disabled children. (I would describe portage is one-on-one therapy) From what I have seen of Ukrainian orphanages, I believe they are similar to Russian orphanages. http://www.thepromise.org.uk/video.htm It makes me want to go to Ukraine RIGHT NOW and get our son!! I am learning to be patient (even though I prefer not to learn :)

Onto a completely different subject...
We had a great time on Sunday at a family cookout. My grandparents were in town, so we all got together. I always wonder why we don't get together more often when almost all of us live within a half hour of each other!!




The reason that I included this picture of Damon is because he's always making that face at me - it means "you have NO idea what you're talking about!" And sometimes I do know :)


The cute little dog is my parent's Yorkshire Terrier "Punkin". Can you believe that she's 10 years old? Speaking of my little "Punkin Pie," here's a picture of her partying when we were on vacation...you would think that my parents had taught her to behave better than that. I guess that makes me the good sister :)

what's in a dossier

my title sounds a little like "what's in a name"

People have asked us what paperwork is included in our dossier to Ukraine, so here's a little breakdown. All documents have to be signed, notarized, county certified (the county verifies that the notary is legit), and apostilled at the Secretary of State's office. (Yes, all those steps can take as long as it sounds like they could. And sometimes much more...)

(1) homestudy - see my post on January 25th to see what was involved in getting this paper!

(2) copy of the homestudy agency's license from the state Department of Job and Family Service

(3) copy of social worker's license

(4) another copy of the social worker's license - this is not normally required, but our social worker had to renew her license before our paperwork was submitted

(5) letter from homestudy agency stating that our social worker works for the agency - sounds redundant, doesn't it?

(6) I-171H approval - see April 25th posting

(7) color copies of our passports - I HATE my passport picture!! I got it taken at the post office for expedited service, and the woman smashed my hair down. I look like I was out in the rain before getting my picture taken!! Enough about that...

(8) Damon's background check from the state

(9) my background check from the state

(10) Damon's employment letter

(11) my employment letter - more proof that we have jobs and can afford the adoption...

(12) Damon's medical results - HIV, TB, and syphilis

(13) my medical results

(14) copy of Damon's doctor's license

(15) copy of my doctor's license - same doc as Damon

(16) copy of marriage license

(17) another copy of marriage license - are you noticing a lot of multiples?

(18) copy of our home's deed

(19) a petition to adopt - this letter is to the Ukrainian government and it states the list of documents we are sending in and asking for permission to visit an orphanage in the hopes of adopting a child

(20) letter of obligation - a letter stating that we will register our son with the Ukrainian Embassy in the US within one month after adoption, and that we will send in yearly reports. We also have to state that our son will keep his Ukrainian citizenship until he is 18 years old.

(21) power of attorney - a letter giving our permission for our translator and/or facilitator to "carry out all actions corresponding with the adoption of a child or children in Ukraine."

(22) another power of attorney

(23) yet another power of attorney

And that folks is our dossier! I know it seems very intimidating, but it is very do-able! When I first saw the list of all the documents we had to get together, I almost freaked out! I was sure that it would take YEARS to get everything together. No paper took longer than a couple weeks to get. The background checks took the longest because we had to send a letter and a money order requesting them, then wait to get them in the mail. We just had our background checks done again, and it took two weeks to get them back this time. Mine expires in late July, so we wanted to get it ready to go in case our dossier isn't submitted before then.

All of the above documents (with one exception) are good for one year from the date of signature, but for Ukraine they must have six months left when they are submitted. So this means that all documents have to be updated after six months. Most of our documents begin to expire in early November, so until then we only have out background checks to send over.

The one exception to the one year rule is our I-171H approval and fingerprinting. Now I can't remember which is which, but I think the fingerprinting expires after 15 months and the I-171H after 18 months. I hope the dossier get submitted before then because I REALLY don't want to pay another $685 to the government!!

Now I am signing off again - have a great night!!

so many things happening...

This post is going to be a long one, so sit back and get comfortable. So many things have been happening that I haven't had a chance to post...

Our dossier is in Ukraine right now!! It should be just about translated. Then comes the wait for submission to the SDA (State Department on Adoption and Children's Rights) which could be as quick as next week or even months... I saw on a newsgroup today that someone heard there are 354 dossiers waiting to be submitted!!! I sure hope not because then its likely that ours won't be submitted for 9 months or so!!!! I shouldn't complain though because MANY people have been waiting longer than us and they survived :)

The garage sale was a smashing success!! We made over $3000 which makes all the hard work worth it! I REALLY have to thank my parents for all the hard work and time that they spent helping get ready and during the sale. No one else was there with us the WHOLE time. Mom and Dad - Thank you so much!! You are the BEST!!!!!!!! I love you!!

Here are a few pictures...

I could not believe how many people showed up! I think as many people showed up to this garage sale as they have to every other sale I've had combined!!

We just got back from a much-needed vacation to Michigan. We go every year with the family and stay in a house on a lake. What a great way to relax!! The only problem is having to come home and go back to work!! Isn't it gorgeous?

Signing off for now...I guess the post wasn't as long as I thought it would be :)

garage sale coming together

Thank you so much to everyone who has given their stuff, time, and money for our garage sale! I am confident that things will be a success!! I thought I would let everyone see what our house looks like right now. And to those of you who know me, you can guess how much this bothers me :)