things are looking up

As you may be able to discern from the title of this posting, good news has come our way. We were able to get everything taken care of with Wesley's tax ID number (and by "we," I mean our translator). After receiving this half sheet of paper, we rushed over to the passport office to get his picture taken. When it was his turn, I took him into the little office where the pictures are taken. The woman set a box on the chair and I set him in it. I was afraid that as soon as I put him down he would start crying, but he didn't. He did cry though as soon as the flash went off. I only saw the picture for a second, but he was looking very serious (as usual).

-------

We went outside to wait for our translator. After about 10 minutes she told us to head back to the apartment, and she would meet us there. As soon as we got to the apartment, we had to move everything out (it was already packed - at least mostly). We waited outside the building, and our translator arrived. I (Staci) was too afraid to even ask when we could expect the passport because I was afraid of being disappointed. Damon asked though and she said that they hoped to get it to us on Tuesday, but should definitely get it by Wednesday. I know I may be setting myself up to be disappointed, but I am hopeful again!

-------

We flew back to Kiev to wait. I was afraid of how Wes would do on the airplane. Any guesses? He was perfectly fine the whole flight - until we began our descent. Then he SCREAMED!! (He also kept tugging on his ears, so I know they were hurting him) We are not talking a little cry, we are talking everyone on the plane knew there was a small child on board. I thought I would be embarrassed, but I wasn't (well, maybe a little). I think Damon was a little bit, but it's not like we could make him stop. We tried to distract him, to get him to suck his thumb, toys, etc. But it didn't work, so what could we do? Any "seasoned" parents out there with suggestions? It's difficult because he won't take a pacifier and cannot eat or drink anything. I am a little worried as our flights home are on three separate flights. Please give me some ideas...

-------

We are in Kiev now, so we'll be just hanging out here around Independence Square. I must say - we're disappointed that we don't have Vicki and Rodney to go to TGI Fridays with :)

-------

Please continue to pray that we receive the passport on Tuesday (or even Wednesday) and that we have time to get thigns done for the US government. Please pray for our bonding to Wes as well.

-------

Love - Staci and Damon

today is not our day

So I guess you can tell by the title that this post is not going to include any good news. Kiev has now given the okay for Wesley's last name, but not his first or middle. Our translator found out that in Kiev they have agreed to give the okay, but they want to see the original documents (which are here in Kharkiv). So our translator just left to head to Kiev and will return Friday morning (hopefully with word that our tax ID has been approved).

-------

The passport office has been closed due to changing offices or something like that, so technically we aren't any more behind than we could have been. I believe though that those who have applied before us during the shutdown will be processed first, thus realistically putting us behind. They might be opening today or tomorrow. We know of two Ukrainian Angels families who have received their child's tax ID numbers and completed the application for the passport, but are still waiting for the actual passport.

-------

So we continue to wait...and we ask you to continue to pray for receipt of the tax ID, passport, and visa, continued health (physical and mental), strength, and perseverance.

Love - Staci and Damon

still waiting on tax id

We are still waiting on Wesley's tax ID number. We found out late Monday night that the woman entering the information here in Kharkov entered his birthdate incorrectly, so the office in Kiev rejected it. It was corrected and resubmitted Monday. We found out today (Wednesday) that the office that was processing our paperwork is not even supposed to do that because we are foreign citizens!! So in an hour we head to the right office, and we are praying it gets taken care of this afternoon. Our translator has been in contact with someone who can make this all come together, so we are hopeful. Keep praying and I'll update later with more pictures!

Love - Staci and Damon

pictures from yesterday and this morning

leaving the orphanage

FINALLY sleeping!!
right before we woke him up to eat this morning

we have our son!!

We picked up Wesley from the orphanage today!! I cannot post any pictures because he is asleep in our room, and the camera cord is somewhere in there. I don't want to wake him up, as it took FOREVER to get him to sleep. Damon and I both laid down on the bed and put him in between us, but he just sat up and played with the pacifier and a blanket. He fell asleep as we were getting up.

-------

Feeding him has gone okay - it's a learning experience. I am just so worried about him getting enough food and water!! We think that we have his feeding schedule, but we cannot be entirely sure. He doesn't seem to mind the feedings as much as I thought he would.

-------

No word on the tax ID. Another family here will receive theirs after nine days waiting, but then they have to wait for the passport. I think I might even be more homesick than I was when we left a couple weeks ago!

-------

Please just pray for all three of us!! We are so worried about doing something wrong - you know, us being first-time parents and a child who cannot eat by mouth! Please also pray for a quick receipt of the tax ID number and the passport - we want to get home. We'll post pictures soon.

Love - Staci and Damon

back in Kharkov (day 40)

We are back in Ukraine after a few great days home! We have been running around from office to office doing paperwork regarding the adoption since we arrived. We found out today that the new tax ID number for Wes is going to take quite a bit longer than we thought!! Apparently you used to be able to get it in a day, but it looks like it is going to be at least another week based on what other families are experiencing!! The process now has to go through Kiev, then back to Kharkov. After receiving the tax ID, we have to wait for the passport, then head to the US Consulate. It looks like we will be here for another two and a half weeks. I don't want to change our return tickets yet because I don't have any idea when we'll be in the US.

-------

We are both just frustrated!! Bet you couldn't tell :) The longer we have to spend over here, the less time we have off work when we get home. Wesley needs surgery as soon as possible, and it just feels to me like no one around here cares much about that at all!! When we get home and after surgery, Wesley will need to be in the hospital for an extended period of time (at least three weeks). This whole trip is costing a ton of money (about twice as much as we originally planned), and it looks like we will spend at least 8-9 weeks total here!! Please just pray for us because we are just feeling so discouraged (especially me - Staci). Not only all this mess about the adoption, but our apartment is crawling with bugs and we've seen evidence of mice. To me, bugs are one thing, but mice (or rats) are something entirely different!!!!

-------

Good news - We were able to visit Wesley yesterday for about an hour. He was so happy to see us!! He was just laughing and he wanted to be passed back and forth between me and Damon. (Can you tell that he likes to imitate the faces we make? Can you also tell how much he likes his Dad??)

-------

We thought we were going to pick up Wes today, but we were running all over the place and by the time we made it to the orphanage, the director was gone. Apparently we will pick him up tomorrow at noon (I will believe it when it actually happens).

-------

So our plan for tomorrow is to go to the bank to withdraw Wesley's disability money, pick up necessary feeding and care supplies at the pharmacy and grocery, pick up gifts for the orphanage director, lawyer, caregivers, children, and then we will be able to pick him up. We'll see how all this goes without a translator. Neither of us has had the chance to feed him through his g-tube, so we are supposed to do that tomorrow. I don't know how that will work when we don't understand a word they say and they don't understand us either! I'll update tomorrow.

-------

Thank you so much for your prayers (we need them)!!

Love - Staci and Damon

enjoying our home in Ohio

We've been home for a few days now, and it's been great!! When I first laid down on our bed at home, I thought it felt "too soft," but now it's just right! The dogs were very excited for us to be home, but Duke decided he was mad at us for about two days. He would sit about 10 feet away from us and stare. He's over it now, but we'll see what happens when we leave again and come home with a child...We have enjoyed seeing our family and friends, and we look forward to them meeting Wesley!

-------

I wonder how Wesley is going to react to us when we return. Damon and I were just talking about how excited we are to be able to spend more than two hours at a time with him! Maybe I won't be as excited when he's crying in the middle of the night, but we'll adjust!

-------

We head out of Ohio on Sunday and arrive in Kiev on Monday. We hope to head from the airport in Kiev to Kharkov, but I am not sure when the flights leave. We have our internet card, so I will update as soon as possible! Please continue to pray for safe travels, the adjustment to the time change, and for our first days as parents!!

Love - Staci and Damon

we're coming home tomorrow (day 34)

The 10 day waiting period was not waived by the judge, but we are not too upset about it. We will miss Wesley (obviously), but we look forward to getting home for a while. I am also looking forward to a house with air conditioning, as it is currently 97 degrees and rising! As a girl accustomed to a/c, this is rough!!

More pictures, as promised

this was a great smile this morning (makes us sad to leave him for a while!)

watching other children play

LOVES to spin without stopping (not easy on Mom or Dad)

the phone was unharmed (thank you for letting us borrow it, Amy L.)

watching us

lest you think I was kidding about the crying...

Love - Staci and Damon

IT'S OFFICIAL!!

We were officially declared the parents of Wesley today! Court took a long time to start, but only lasted about 25 minutes. The judge is considering waiving the 10 day waiting period, but we'll find out for sure tomorrow. Please continue to pray that it is waived!!

-------

So here are the pictures everyone has been waiting on...

here's the serious look I was talking about

playing inside the orphanage

a family of three (I took this picture today. I would have shown a picture without something in his mouth, but that seriously limits my options! And since today is symbolic...)

isn't this the sweetest picture??

he LOVES riding on our shoulders!

I will post more pictures tomorrow! It's been a long day, and I need my sleep!!

Love - Staci and Damon

day 28 & typical 17 month-old behavior

Things have been going well with Wesley. He still whines and cries at random times for no apparent reason (at least as far as we can tell), but he is getting more comfortable with us (and us with him). I appreciate all the posts and emails of encouragement from everyone - it helps us to know that his behavior is normal for his age. I know that he isn't sure exactly what is going on as he has never had this much attention placed solely on him by two adults!
-------
We're looking forward to going home next week to refresh. I hope that us going home next week does not set us back in our attachment with Wesley. We look forward to Wesley meeting our friends and family this fall. I know they are all going to love him like we do!
-------

Here is a picture of Damon with Wesley on his shoulders - I can post it since you cannot see Wesley's face, but you can see how blonde his hair is! I cannot wait to post pictures of our cute little guy after court!!

I may have spoken too soon...

I was just saying how comfortable Wesley was getting with us, and then we had a day like today. He cried almost the ENTIRE time we were with him! Nothing seemed to settle him down. I am not sure what was going on. We're working on getting to know each other, so I guess it's going to take time - it's just discouraging to have a small child screaming and you are doing all you can to help, but it doesn't work! Praying for a better day tomorrow...

Love - Staci and Damon

day 25

All the paperwork has been completed for court and the adoption. It looks like court will be next Wednesday 08/13 or Thursday 08/14. We're planning on heading home on Friday afternoon and getting home around midnight. We're looking forward to seeing everyone. The name we have chosen for our son is Wesley Kirill. We decided to keep his current name as his middle name because we thought it fit him.

-------

We've been visiting our little guy every day. I am also happy to report that he is getting more comfortable with us. Today he only cried a little when the orphanage workers handed him to us, and this is a great improvement from an all out sob. Then when we left today, I set him on the play mat with the other children. He was fine until we headed for the door, and then he started crying. He was looking at up with his lower lip sticking out and tears in his eyes - SO adorable!! Who would have ever thought I would be so happy to see my son cry?? But it's so nice to see that he actually enjoys having us around! At first we were very concerned because he hated for us to hold him and he would cry if he could see an orphanage worker. I think he was trying to get them to take him and hold him.

-------

We were also noticing today that he is getting a lot better with his hands. He is able to manipulate toys with more dexterity than a week ago. He is also putting things in his mouth, even though I know the workers don't like them to do that. We want him to put things in his mouth and feel the different textures and flavors, so that will help with the transition to eating food. I took out the tape measure to get his measurements for clothing, and that turned out to be his favorite toy to play with today. We had a box of crayons, and he slobbered all over the box and tore it apart, so we had to throw it out. He's sucking his thumb more - good because it works the muscles in his mouth and throat.

-------

He is also vocalizing more. We aren't sure what he's saying as it is mostly babble, but it's still good to hear. He almost said the word "dog" the other day! We're working on it...

-------

We've been doing lots of walking. I've been reading my adoption books on attachment and bonding. We only get a few television channels in English, so BBC is on pretty much all the time. All that is on BBC is about the Olympics and it repeats about every two hours, but it's better than nothing!! They've even been talking about the start of football season, so we're excited to watch Ohio State and the Bengals. We should be home in time for the start of the season!! The weather has been nice - it is almost 2:00p and the temperature is 76 degrees.

Love - Staci and Damon

(WOW - this post is long, I guess I had a lot to say!)

day 22

We've been visiting our little boy every day. He's becoming more comfortable with us, so we're thankful for that! When we went to visit him today, the workers told us that he was getting ready to go to the hospital to have his feeding tube changed, so we only saw him for about 10 minutes. We'll go back tomorrow, but I don't know if we'll stay for the whole time because we are starting the paperwork to adopt him. We had originally planned to stay here in Ukraine until the end of the 10 day waiting period, but since we've already been here three weeks, we are likely going to go home after court. I hate to spend that much money to fly home for less than two weeks, but I think it would raise our spirits to see our family, friends, and dogs.

-------

We've been doing a little sightseeing here in Kharkov. We even went today and purchased a couple of outfits for him. It took us over an hour to find the stores, but we finally did! Here are a few pictures from our adventures...

the fabulous dinner I cooked

(when I bought the chicken nuggets, I didn't realize we only have a stove - no oven. We also couldn't read the writing on the bag, so the vernikys (sp?) had a sweet cream filling)

this is the only dentist's office I have seen since we've been here (Amber, they could use you!!)

sandcastles in a large square in downtown

I also wanted to tell everyone that we LOVE getting comments! You don't have to have an account to leave any comments, just post anonymously and type your name at the end of your post. Thanks!

Love - Staci and Damon

we've made a decision...

We met the little boy that we came to see in Kharkov (or is it Kharkiv?), and we have decided to adopt him!!! Obviously we are very excited. It's so hard to believe that we have finally met the little boy who is our son. I've been imagining meeting him for years, and I am so happy that the day finally arrived!

-------

I would love to post pictures, but I think it's best to wait until he is "officially" ours! I always hated when other bloggers didn't post pictures until later, but if I keep you in suspense, you'll keep checking back and reading what I post :) I will tell you that he is 17 months old, has blonde hair, blue eyes and is absolutely adorable!!

-------

He was born without part of his esophagus (called esophageal atresia), and what this means is that he is fed through a stomach tube for the time being. Surgery is required to either stretch the esophagus ends to each other or use part of his intestine as an esophagus. We aren't sure at this point how much esophagus he has, so we don't know how extensive the surgery will be. We're already praying for that as well.

-------

Thank you for your prayers and support!!

Love - Staci and Damon

SDA appointment #2

We had our second appointment with SDA officials this afternoon. We have accepted the referral for a little boy in region in eastern Ukraine. He does have a condition that will require surgery, but as to the extent, we are unsure at this point. Damon and I will be leaving Kiev with our translator tomorrow evening and will hopefully get a chance to meet the little boy on Wednesday.

-------

Please continue to pray for us as we ask for God's wisdom in the choices we make for our family. Thank you to everyone who has posted comments and sent emails - we enjoy reading them!!

Love - Staci and Damon

-------

PS I hope everyone likes the new background. I have a lot of time here in Ukraine to mess around with stuff like that! I have also added a few pictures at the bottom, but I haven't typed in descriptions. (maybe later...)

appointment on Monday

We have our second appointment with the SDA on Monday afternoon. Please continue to pray that we are shown the file for our son and that we know when we see it. We are not sure what the outcome of the meeting will be, but we are confident that God is still in control of our situation.

-------

Still feeling homesick, but getting accustomed to living here in Ukraine. Thank you to our friends and family for keeping us up-to-date on what's going on at home, and thank you to our online blogging friends for the wonderful words of advice and the restaurant ideas.

-------

Here are a few more pictures of desserts we've eaten.

(Yes, we do more than just eat dessert here!)

a few more days in Kiev...

We're still here in Kiev. We haven't received a date for our second appointment, but hopefully that will be on Monday or Tuesday. We don't really have a whole lot to report - just hanging out, sightseeing/walking, and sleeping.

Pleas continue to pray for us - we are feeling homesick and missing our dogs. We'll post when we have news...
Staci and Damon

another day in Kiev

I don't think it is still jet lag, but we are just not going to sleep at a decent hour. I do not believe that we have gone to sleep before 12:30a since we've been here, but then I don't wake up until around 10a. This might seem late, but since it's only 3:00a at home, I consider it quite early!

-------

We met up with our friends Vicki and Rodney yesterday, and they took us to a great upscale cafe where we had wonderful food and dessert!! Here's what Damon and I had for dessert:

Since people like pictures, here are a few from our walks about town.

Us in front of the Kiev Opera House.

"Snowboarding" on the steps of the Opera House (No, I don't understand it either!)

LOTS of men playing chess in the park.

Independence Square in Kiev.

The kitchen at our new apartment.
The bedroom at our apartment.

The living room in our apartment.

Us in front of flowers on the street. Our friends in front of the Opera House.

we're still here!

Hello, All! We finally have reliable internet access without going to the internet cafes. I first want to thank everyone for their prayers - believe me, we can feel them!! Thank you also for the emails and posts to our blog - we're reading and enjoying them!
-------

We had our appointment at the SDA on Tuesday morning (the picture above is us after the appt). We were shown quite a few files (I would estimate around 8 or so). We chose to go and visit a 19 month old boy in a region FAR from Kiev. We visited with the little boy for at least four hours yesterday, and after MUCH prayer and talking, we realized that the medical condition he has might be more than we are prepared to handle. He is a sweet boy that I am confident with find a loving forever home - I've already been praying for him.

-------

I definitely underestimated how heart-wrenching a decision not to adopt a particular child is!! I can still picture all the sweet faces of the children from our SDA appointment and also those we met while at the orphanage.

-------
What happens next? We have written a letter to the SDA asking for a second appointment, so we hope to get that by late next week. For now though we are back in Kiev in an apartment that is as much like home as we've seen :) It's also great to have internet access, so expect more posts and pictures to be forthcoming.

-------
And my girls in Ohio know how much I need this...I must confess though, it's not as good as "real" Diet Coke!!

The architecture here in Kiev is quite beautiful - especially the churches!

Anyone interesting in getting in contact with us, email me at stacianddamon@gmail.com and I'll give you our cell phone number. It will not cost us much at all, but it could be expensive for you to call! Please continue to pray for us as we prepare for our second appointment and as we explore the city. Please also pray for our friends Vicki and Rodney as they go for their second appointment on Tuesday as they look for a little girl to complete their family.

Love - Staci and Damon

leaving the US tomorrow

We leave the United States tomorrow and head to Ukraine! It is so hard to believe that it is time to finally take the big trip across the ocean. I don't have time to write about all the thoughts and feelings going through me right now (more packing to do), but please continue to pray for us, our appointment, our team in Ukraine, and for all those we with which we come into contact. I'll update as soon as possible...until then, good-bye!

Staci

13 days and counting

We only have 13 days until our SDA appointment! So far I am not freaking out, but I am crazy-stressed and busy. I am not sure that I have gotten to bed before 12:30am so far this week. It doesn't look like it is going to happen tonight either (I guess that I could be working on items instead of blogging, but oh well).

--------------------

I am hoping to get a lot done this weekend since we both have Friday off work. I would love to get his room completely finished. And what I mean by "finished" is started and finished. The bed needs to be put together, pictures hung, curtains/blinds purchased and hung, decorated, etc. So really nothing to do :) Also throw in packing for the trip, getting things at work taken care of so I can be gone, getting things at home taken care of, regular day-to-day stuff like laundry, bills, etc and there is no time for relaxing (or even sleeping for that matter).

--------------------

I am going to go get a few things done before heading off to bed. I just wanted to let everyone know that we hadn't fallen off the face of the earth. Please continue to pray for our appointment and that our hearts would be open for whatever child God has in store for us. Thank you!

Staci

Expectations

We have three and a half weeks until we leave - talk about surreal!! It seems like this is something that we have been waiting on forever, and I am so thankful that it is all coming true!!!

---------------------

Since we are "expecting" (though not in the traditional birth way), I have always thought about what our son will be like, as I imagine most parents-to-be do. Since we have been in this process for about 18 months, my expectations and ideas have changed. It's so funny, our son in my mind has gotten older as we have waited for him to arrive. I never expected that he would age in my mind as we went through the process! When we started the whole process, I was sure that our son had to be 18 months old (at most), but now he is at least three or four years old in my mind. Anyone else have their child age in their mind as they waited?

---------------------

We have started updating all our dossier documents for travel. We are getting three copies of each document in the chance we decide to adopt two children. I am hoping to get everything gathered in the next week or so to give us time to get to the Secretary of State's office in Columbus a few weeks before we leave. I just want to be sure that we don't have any paperwork "snafus" before leaving. Of course that means that if it is not the paperwork, then it will be something else...such is life :)

please pray for the Chapman family

Please pray for the family of Christian singer Steven Curtis Chapman. They family lost their daughter/sister Maria in a tragic accident. The brother especially needs to be wrapped in prayer. Visit http://www.stevencurtischapman.com/ for more information.

a home has been purchased

We FINALLY found a place to call home! Good thing too because we have to be out of our house in less than a month! It is pretty much everything that we wanted - even a fenced yard for the dogs!! It is not a ranch like we wanted, but it is a nice tri-level. We are very excited about this house - it will be a great place to bring our son home to! It is very close to a couple of our close friends, but only 30 minutes away from where we currently live. We will both be closer to work, which will really save on gas money!!

-------

Now that the house has been purchased, I need to focus again on getting our dossier updated for travel. We have our fingerprinting redone tomorrow morning at the USCIS Department, so I have at least gotten that scheduled in the chaos! I plan on taking one updated copy for the facilitator, and one for us if needed. What are some other documents that we might be asked for by a judge? I almost forgot about copies of tax returns.

-------

Staci

what's in a name?

Thursday night Damon and I went to dinner at our favorite local Mexican restaurant. Every time that we go, we talk about visiting our friends who are missionaries in Puebla, and Damon is ready to go back to visit. Well...as we are eating our chips and salsa, Damon said "I can't wait to go to Mexico with Trent." I said "who?" and Damon replied (in a sarcastic tone) "our son."

-

Now I don't know if I've talked about this before, but it took us a LONG time to agree on names for our children (as we plan on changing their first names). I can assure you though, the boy's name we agreed on was not Trent (short for Trenton), even though that was one of the two finalists. So apparently I have been telling people that we are naming our son Wesley, while Damon has been telling people we are naming him Trenton. So I guess we need to decide on a name (again). It's pretty funny though because I thought that was one of the things we had "nailed down" in the large amount of unknowns in international adoption :)

---------------

In news entirely unrelated, we have accepted an offer on our home! I realize that our home has been for sale for about 2 months now, but I never seriously considered the fact that it might sell and we would have to move! (Sometimes I just don't think things through...) I don't mean to sound like such an airhead, but I didn't think the house was likely to sell based on market conditions.

-

I am actually pretty sad about leaving this house. It was our first home together, and it is finally the way we always wanted it to look!! If I am totally honest though, I am afraid of change. I feel like we are changing our lives so much with the adoption, and I feel overwhelmed as it is. I guess I should have thought of that before we put the house on the market :)

-

So we have to begin searching for a new home to move into before we leave for our appointment in 73 days. We have to be out of our house by June 15th, so we have some work to do! Better get back to house-hunting on the internet. How did people do it before?

Staci