I may have spoken too soon...

I was just saying how comfortable Wesley was getting with us, and then we had a day like today. He cried almost the ENTIRE time we were with him! Nothing seemed to settle him down. I am not sure what was going on. We're working on getting to know each other, so I guess it's going to take time - it's just discouraging to have a small child screaming and you are doing all you can to help, but it doesn't work! Praying for a better day tomorrow...

Love - Staci and Damon

day 25

All the paperwork has been completed for court and the adoption. It looks like court will be next Wednesday 08/13 or Thursday 08/14. We're planning on heading home on Friday afternoon and getting home around midnight. We're looking forward to seeing everyone. The name we have chosen for our son is Wesley Kirill. We decided to keep his current name as his middle name because we thought it fit him.

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We've been visiting our little guy every day. I am also happy to report that he is getting more comfortable with us. Today he only cried a little when the orphanage workers handed him to us, and this is a great improvement from an all out sob. Then when we left today, I set him on the play mat with the other children. He was fine until we headed for the door, and then he started crying. He was looking at up with his lower lip sticking out and tears in his eyes - SO adorable!! Who would have ever thought I would be so happy to see my son cry?? But it's so nice to see that he actually enjoys having us around! At first we were very concerned because he hated for us to hold him and he would cry if he could see an orphanage worker. I think he was trying to get them to take him and hold him.

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We were also noticing today that he is getting a lot better with his hands. He is able to manipulate toys with more dexterity than a week ago. He is also putting things in his mouth, even though I know the workers don't like them to do that. We want him to put things in his mouth and feel the different textures and flavors, so that will help with the transition to eating food. I took out the tape measure to get his measurements for clothing, and that turned out to be his favorite toy to play with today. We had a box of crayons, and he slobbered all over the box and tore it apart, so we had to throw it out. He's sucking his thumb more - good because it works the muscles in his mouth and throat.

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He is also vocalizing more. We aren't sure what he's saying as it is mostly babble, but it's still good to hear. He almost said the word "dog" the other day! We're working on it...

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We've been doing lots of walking. I've been reading my adoption books on attachment and bonding. We only get a few television channels in English, so BBC is on pretty much all the time. All that is on BBC is about the Olympics and it repeats about every two hours, but it's better than nothing!! They've even been talking about the start of football season, so we're excited to watch Ohio State and the Bengals. We should be home in time for the start of the season!! The weather has been nice - it is almost 2:00p and the temperature is 76 degrees.

Love - Staci and Damon

(WOW - this post is long, I guess I had a lot to say!)

day 22

We've been visiting our little boy every day. He's becoming more comfortable with us, so we're thankful for that! When we went to visit him today, the workers told us that he was getting ready to go to the hospital to have his feeding tube changed, so we only saw him for about 10 minutes. We'll go back tomorrow, but I don't know if we'll stay for the whole time because we are starting the paperwork to adopt him. We had originally planned to stay here in Ukraine until the end of the 10 day waiting period, but since we've already been here three weeks, we are likely going to go home after court. I hate to spend that much money to fly home for less than two weeks, but I think it would raise our spirits to see our family, friends, and dogs.

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We've been doing a little sightseeing here in Kharkov. We even went today and purchased a couple of outfits for him. It took us over an hour to find the stores, but we finally did! Here are a few pictures from our adventures...

the fabulous dinner I cooked

(when I bought the chicken nuggets, I didn't realize we only have a stove - no oven. We also couldn't read the writing on the bag, so the vernikys (sp?) had a sweet cream filling)

this is the only dentist's office I have seen since we've been here (Amber, they could use you!!)

sandcastles in a large square in downtown

I also wanted to tell everyone that we LOVE getting comments! You don't have to have an account to leave any comments, just post anonymously and type your name at the end of your post. Thanks!

Love - Staci and Damon

we've made a decision...

We met the little boy that we came to see in Kharkov (or is it Kharkiv?), and we have decided to adopt him!!! Obviously we are very excited. It's so hard to believe that we have finally met the little boy who is our son. I've been imagining meeting him for years, and I am so happy that the day finally arrived!

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I would love to post pictures, but I think it's best to wait until he is "officially" ours! I always hated when other bloggers didn't post pictures until later, but if I keep you in suspense, you'll keep checking back and reading what I post :) I will tell you that he is 17 months old, has blonde hair, blue eyes and is absolutely adorable!!

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He was born without part of his esophagus (called esophageal atresia), and what this means is that he is fed through a stomach tube for the time being. Surgery is required to either stretch the esophagus ends to each other or use part of his intestine as an esophagus. We aren't sure at this point how much esophagus he has, so we don't know how extensive the surgery will be. We're already praying for that as well.

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Thank you for your prayers and support!!

Love - Staci and Damon

SDA appointment #2

We had our second appointment with SDA officials this afternoon. We have accepted the referral for a little boy in region in eastern Ukraine. He does have a condition that will require surgery, but as to the extent, we are unsure at this point. Damon and I will be leaving Kiev with our translator tomorrow evening and will hopefully get a chance to meet the little boy on Wednesday.

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Please continue to pray for us as we ask for God's wisdom in the choices we make for our family. Thank you to everyone who has posted comments and sent emails - we enjoy reading them!!

Love - Staci and Damon

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PS I hope everyone likes the new background. I have a lot of time here in Ukraine to mess around with stuff like that! I have also added a few pictures at the bottom, but I haven't typed in descriptions. (maybe later...)

appointment on Monday

We have our second appointment with the SDA on Monday afternoon. Please continue to pray that we are shown the file for our son and that we know when we see it. We are not sure what the outcome of the meeting will be, but we are confident that God is still in control of our situation.

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Still feeling homesick, but getting accustomed to living here in Ukraine. Thank you to our friends and family for keeping us up-to-date on what's going on at home, and thank you to our online blogging friends for the wonderful words of advice and the restaurant ideas.

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Here are a few more pictures of desserts we've eaten.

(Yes, we do more than just eat dessert here!)

a few more days in Kiev...

We're still here in Kiev. We haven't received a date for our second appointment, but hopefully that will be on Monday or Tuesday. We don't really have a whole lot to report - just hanging out, sightseeing/walking, and sleeping.

Pleas continue to pray for us - we are feeling homesick and missing our dogs. We'll post when we have news...
Staci and Damon

another day in Kiev

I don't think it is still jet lag, but we are just not going to sleep at a decent hour. I do not believe that we have gone to sleep before 12:30a since we've been here, but then I don't wake up until around 10a. This might seem late, but since it's only 3:00a at home, I consider it quite early!

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We met up with our friends Vicki and Rodney yesterday, and they took us to a great upscale cafe where we had wonderful food and dessert!! Here's what Damon and I had for dessert:

Since people like pictures, here are a few from our walks about town.

Us in front of the Kiev Opera House.

"Snowboarding" on the steps of the Opera House (No, I don't understand it either!)

LOTS of men playing chess in the park.

Independence Square in Kiev.

The kitchen at our new apartment.
The bedroom at our apartment.

The living room in our apartment.

Us in front of flowers on the street. Our friends in front of the Opera House.

we're still here!

Hello, All! We finally have reliable internet access without going to the internet cafes. I first want to thank everyone for their prayers - believe me, we can feel them!! Thank you also for the emails and posts to our blog - we're reading and enjoying them!
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We had our appointment at the SDA on Tuesday morning (the picture above is us after the appt). We were shown quite a few files (I would estimate around 8 or so). We chose to go and visit a 19 month old boy in a region FAR from Kiev. We visited with the little boy for at least four hours yesterday, and after MUCH prayer and talking, we realized that the medical condition he has might be more than we are prepared to handle. He is a sweet boy that I am confident with find a loving forever home - I've already been praying for him.

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I definitely underestimated how heart-wrenching a decision not to adopt a particular child is!! I can still picture all the sweet faces of the children from our SDA appointment and also those we met while at the orphanage.

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What happens next? We have written a letter to the SDA asking for a second appointment, so we hope to get that by late next week. For now though we are back in Kiev in an apartment that is as much like home as we've seen :) It's also great to have internet access, so expect more posts and pictures to be forthcoming.

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And my girls in Ohio know how much I need this...I must confess though, it's not as good as "real" Diet Coke!!

The architecture here in Kiev is quite beautiful - especially the churches!

Anyone interesting in getting in contact with us, email me at stacianddamon@gmail.com and I'll give you our cell phone number. It will not cost us much at all, but it could be expensive for you to call! Please continue to pray for us as we prepare for our second appointment and as we explore the city. Please also pray for our friends Vicki and Rodney as they go for their second appointment on Tuesday as they look for a little girl to complete their family.

Love - Staci and Damon

leaving the US tomorrow

We leave the United States tomorrow and head to Ukraine! It is so hard to believe that it is time to finally take the big trip across the ocean. I don't have time to write about all the thoughts and feelings going through me right now (more packing to do), but please continue to pray for us, our appointment, our team in Ukraine, and for all those we with which we come into contact. I'll update as soon as possible...until then, good-bye!

Staci

13 days and counting

We only have 13 days until our SDA appointment! So far I am not freaking out, but I am crazy-stressed and busy. I am not sure that I have gotten to bed before 12:30am so far this week. It doesn't look like it is going to happen tonight either (I guess that I could be working on items instead of blogging, but oh well).

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I am hoping to get a lot done this weekend since we both have Friday off work. I would love to get his room completely finished. And what I mean by "finished" is started and finished. The bed needs to be put together, pictures hung, curtains/blinds purchased and hung, decorated, etc. So really nothing to do :) Also throw in packing for the trip, getting things at work taken care of so I can be gone, getting things at home taken care of, regular day-to-day stuff like laundry, bills, etc and there is no time for relaxing (or even sleeping for that matter).

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I am going to go get a few things done before heading off to bed. I just wanted to let everyone know that we hadn't fallen off the face of the earth. Please continue to pray for our appointment and that our hearts would be open for whatever child God has in store for us. Thank you!

Staci

Expectations

We have three and a half weeks until we leave - talk about surreal!! It seems like this is something that we have been waiting on forever, and I am so thankful that it is all coming true!!!

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Since we are "expecting" (though not in the traditional birth way), I have always thought about what our son will be like, as I imagine most parents-to-be do. Since we have been in this process for about 18 months, my expectations and ideas have changed. It's so funny, our son in my mind has gotten older as we have waited for him to arrive. I never expected that he would age in my mind as we went through the process! When we started the whole process, I was sure that our son had to be 18 months old (at most), but now he is at least three or four years old in my mind. Anyone else have their child age in their mind as they waited?

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We have started updating all our dossier documents for travel. We are getting three copies of each document in the chance we decide to adopt two children. I am hoping to get everything gathered in the next week or so to give us time to get to the Secretary of State's office in Columbus a few weeks before we leave. I just want to be sure that we don't have any paperwork "snafus" before leaving. Of course that means that if it is not the paperwork, then it will be something else...such is life :)

please pray for the Chapman family

Please pray for the family of Christian singer Steven Curtis Chapman. They family lost their daughter/sister Maria in a tragic accident. The brother especially needs to be wrapped in prayer. Visit http://www.stevencurtischapman.com/ for more information.

a home has been purchased

We FINALLY found a place to call home! Good thing too because we have to be out of our house in less than a month! It is pretty much everything that we wanted - even a fenced yard for the dogs!! It is not a ranch like we wanted, but it is a nice tri-level. We are very excited about this house - it will be a great place to bring our son home to! It is very close to a couple of our close friends, but only 30 minutes away from where we currently live. We will both be closer to work, which will really save on gas money!!

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Now that the house has been purchased, I need to focus again on getting our dossier updated for travel. We have our fingerprinting redone tomorrow morning at the USCIS Department, so I have at least gotten that scheduled in the chaos! I plan on taking one updated copy for the facilitator, and one for us if needed. What are some other documents that we might be asked for by a judge? I almost forgot about copies of tax returns.

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Staci

what's in a name?

Thursday night Damon and I went to dinner at our favorite local Mexican restaurant. Every time that we go, we talk about visiting our friends who are missionaries in Puebla, and Damon is ready to go back to visit. Well...as we are eating our chips and salsa, Damon said "I can't wait to go to Mexico with Trent." I said "who?" and Damon replied (in a sarcastic tone) "our son."

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Now I don't know if I've talked about this before, but it took us a LONG time to agree on names for our children (as we plan on changing their first names). I can assure you though, the boy's name we agreed on was not Trent (short for Trenton), even though that was one of the two finalists. So apparently I have been telling people that we are naming our son Wesley, while Damon has been telling people we are naming him Trenton. So I guess we need to decide on a name (again). It's pretty funny though because I thought that was one of the things we had "nailed down" in the large amount of unknowns in international adoption :)

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In news entirely unrelated, we have accepted an offer on our home! I realize that our home has been for sale for about 2 months now, but I never seriously considered the fact that it might sell and we would have to move! (Sometimes I just don't think things through...) I don't mean to sound like such an airhead, but I didn't think the house was likely to sell based on market conditions.

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I am actually pretty sad about leaving this house. It was our first home together, and it is finally the way we always wanted it to look!! If I am totally honest though, I am afraid of change. I feel like we are changing our lives so much with the adoption, and I feel overwhelmed as it is. I guess I should have thought of that before we put the house on the market :)

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So we have to begin searching for a new home to move into before we leave for our appointment in 73 days. We have to be out of our house by June 15th, so we have some work to do! Better get back to house-hunting on the internet. How did people do it before?

Staci

changes in UA adoption

Things with adoption in Ukraine right now are up in the air for some people. Rumor has it that a law has been passed preventing singles from adopting and married couples from adopting a child more than 45 years younger than the oldest parent. As far as I can tell, nothing has been confirmed yet. I know that some people say that it has passed, but since Cathy Harris hasn't confirmed it, I highly doubt these other people know more than she would know! So until I receive word from Cathy, I do choose not to believe the rumors.

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Please pray for all those already in the process (especially my friend Kendall - her blog is listed to the right) and for all the children who may not end up with a forever home. It breaks my heart to think of all the children who might not receive a better life outside of the orphanage!!

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We have booked our flight to Kyiv in July! Every time we get a little bit closer in the process, I think "wow - we are really doing this." I don't think that because I have changed my mind - it's just that this is something I have wanted to do for so long that I have trouble believing that my dreams are coming true (becoming a Mom and adopting a child).

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I have been emailing every day to Vicki. She and her husband have an appointment the same day as we do. It's great to share information with someone who is at the same step in the process as you are.

OUR APPOINTMENT DATE!

We received word from our facilitator that our appointment date is the middle of July!! 3 months to go and so much to do...better get started! :)

day 10 of our "20" day wait

We are on business day 10 of the "20" day wait to hear our appointment date. I put the 20 in quotes because it is unlikely that we will find out by the 20th day. That is okay though - I am used to waiting. Don't you usually have to wait for the best things in life?

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Why is it that I am just not motivated to start getting things done? I am traditionally no a procrastinator, but during the adoption process I have started that bad habit!! I need to schedule our immunizations, update paperwork for our travel, start a personal packing list (from suggestions of others), finish the child's room, train a coworker to do my job when I am out of the country, weed my flowerbeds (not adoption-related), and so on...

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Since I have at least done a little bit for the room, I will post a picture of the quilt we purchased. We love dogs, so that's the theme we picked for the room. Isn't it adorable??? I still need curtains, and we have to put the bed together. I have just a trundle bed in there now since I didn't want to put the big bed together in case we had to move.

WE ARE SUBMITTED!

We received word this weekend that our dossier has been submitted. YAY!! Now we are in the waiting period to find out when our appointment will be. From others that have been submitted this year, I assume that our appointment will be around mid to late July at the earliest. So I guess we'll be there for the warm, sticky summer months with the bugs and everything...believe me - I am not complaining though!! I am so thankful that we will be given a chance to travel to find our son!!

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We had an open house yesterday with a limited turnout of only 6 couples. The only complaint was the hill in the backyard, so that is encouraging. No offers though, but we're optimistic that one will come. If it doesn't though, we wait until next spring to try again. Damon really wants to get it done now, where it doesn't matter as much to me. I just worry about taking on too much before the adoption.

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I am again fighting an upper respiratory/sinus infection. This is the third one since Christmas, and it is getting old! What is bothering me now is the deep chest cough. It is bothering Damon too since I am keeping him up at night :) I think I am going to head off to bed now to see if I can get some rest!

waiting for the submission news

I haven't heard anything to the contrary, so we assume that our dossier has been submitted. I am sure it has been, but I will feel much better once we get official word from our facilitator. I have been told that she is unable to email right now, so that's the reason for the silence.

I'll let you know for sure soon...hopefully :)

No word as of yet...

I haven't received an email from our faclitator yet!! I am sure that everything is fine, but I am running through all the various things that could have gone wrong with the submission in my head...I am making myself get off the computer because I keep hitting "send and receive" on my email every five seconds (andyes, I know what time it is in Ukraine right now (around 2:00a), but maybe the email is delayed). I will post if I hear anything later...

4 days to submission...

I cannot believe that we only have 4 days until out dossier is submitted!! It feels surreal, and I am trying not to get my hopes up too high in case something happens. I really have no idea what could happen, but in the event that something does happen I will be a little better prepared. Our facilitator says that we have everything ready to go, so I trust her.

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I have decided that I better get my behind in gear...I was so gung-ho reading books, doing research, and preparing when we first starting this adoption journey, but in the last six months I have slacked off. I am not sure if it is because I was upset at how slowly it felt like things were going or what, but I have been trying to motivate myself! The good news though is that in the last six months I have been very diligent in saving money. I really wish I had been this attentive to our money for the past 5 years! I cannot imagine the amount we would have in savings now! I guess it is best not to think about it :(

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Our house is also for sale right now. We are trying to move before the adoption because once we get home, we won't move for a while to create stability for our child(ren). I feel like we haven't had enough interest in it, but the weather here in Ohio recently probably has something to do with it. We had a blizzard two weekends ago and since then it has been raining almost nonstop. I am happy to report though that today was a beautiful sunny day! It's amazing how much better you feel when the sun is shining :) Hopefully things pick up in the housing market, but if not, then we won't move. We are really looking to move to be closer to our jobs. We both drive at least 25 minutes to get to work, and we would like to be able to spend that time at home rather than on the road. We'll see what happens.

Here is Duke staring out at the snow from last weekend. I had to shovel the back porch so the dogs could get outside. And yes...Duke is wearing a sweater because he was spending so much time outside that I was worried about him getting too cold!

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What else to talk about...I am super-psyched for the Celebrity Apprentice tonight! I am a country music fan, so I am excited that Trace Adkins is doing so well! I think he and Piers Morgan will be the two facing off for the finale. I think Trace will win though!

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So apparently the basketball season is wrapping up because Damon had me fill out a basketball pool. He knows that I don't even like basketball, but he wants me to pick these teams that I know NOTHING about. Then as I pick teams for various reasons (like the fact that I like the name of the school), he makes fun of me! What is that about? then as I have done for the past five years, I pick Duke to win it all. I pick them because that is the name of one of our dogs, even though he is not named after the school. One of these days they are going to win, and thus I will finish somewhere above the bottom three in a pool...

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Our niece Julie got married last weekend to Isaac. It was a very nice ceremony and reception. Damon walked her down the aisle since her father passed away about 18 months ago, so that was nice. Here are a few pictures from the happy day

Mom doing well

Thanks so much for your prayers! The surgery went well, and the doctor also ended up fixing two hernias he found! Mom is pretty worn out as of now, but she is looking much better than she did after the surgery. She will be in the hospital for another day or two, but I am leaving Cleveland late this afternoon.

I just found out this morning that one of my best friends brothers has come down with a bad case of pancreatitis. The family is all down there now, so please pray that he recovers quickly. I think he might be getting married soon...

Damon is in Columbus right now apostilling the last of our documents to update before submission! We will have to update others, but we can do that before traveling. WOW! Hard to believe that it is only about a month until our dossier is submitted! In some ways it seems like forever since we started the adoption process, but in other ways it seems like it has gone fast. (I am sure that sounds a little convoluted)

Thank you so much for those praying - it means a lot to me and my family!
Staci

asking for prayer

I am not sure how many blog readers are there pray, but if you do, I ask you to pray for my mother who is having surgery Thursday morning at Cleveland Clinic. Right now things don't look great, but of course they could always be worse!! My mom is an amazingly strong woman and I am confident she will get through the surgery without complications, but we aren't sure until the surgery what will have to be done afterwards or the extent of the problems.

So please pray for her, my dad, and the whole family. I'll update once the surgery is over.
Thank you!!

random thoughts

I have been meaning to post more often than I have, but somehow I just haven't gotten around to it. I have been trying to read a few Ukrainian adopter blogs and give comments. I always like to get them (hint, hint), so I try and offer a word of encouragement to let them know someone is out there reading their posts.

Has anyone else had this sinus mess going around? I got it the week before Christmas and I am STILL trying to get rid of it. Unfortunately mine is not the head congestion stuff, but rather it has settled in my chest and I just can't get rid of it!! YUCK! I missed three days of work last week, so I hate to think of all I have to do when I get back!!

I don't know if anyone out in cyberspace reading this is near Cincinnati Children's Hospital, but they are offering what I would consider to be a good class coming up. It is called "everything you ever wanted to know about international adoption...now you can ask." At first I thought it sounded like it was about the process of adopting, but it isn't that at all. The classes are on Saturdays from 10a-12p as follows:

02/23/08 - attachment issues

03/01/08 - now that you are home

03/08/08 - expect the unexpected

03/15/08 - mystery history

The woman teaching it is a psychotherapist and an adoptive parent herself. She spoke at the other adoption classes offered at CCHMC, and Damon and I were impressed by her.

We have a few papers that we have to send over to Ukraine before our paperwork is submitted because they expire on March 10th (10 days before our submission date). I am normally not very pleased when we have to redo the paperwork (yet again), but since we have a date to be submitted somehow I don't mind :) Fancy that...

Damon has also decided that now is the time to sell our house. I am not against selling our house at all, but I just think of all the things we have to do before that can happen! And with the housing market being so poor right now, will we have time to sell ours and buy another before traveling to Ukraine? The thought just stresses me out a LITTLE bit...

Since I have been trying to organize our pictures on the computer, I thought I would post a few that make me smile

This is our dog Duke when we had a snowstorm three years ago. How cute is he in his little coat? (Yes, we will dress our dogs in coats or sweaters when it is cold outside, but Duke doesn't usually get one put on because he doesn't get cold like Katie)

This is Damon on our honeymoon in Hawaii. He did not think that he needed suncreen as we drove in a convertible through Volcano National Park for at least three hours. Since he was wrong, he had to use aloe vera gel as hair gel for a day or two.

This was on our trip to Mexico in the spring of 2006. We went to visit our friends Joe and Jenna who are serving as missionairies there. The purple flowers are a bouganvilia plant that has to hundreds of years old. I posted the picture with Damon and Joe in front so you could see just how large the plant really is! Isn't it gorgeous??

I had to change the colors because I am having trouble getting this to look like I want it to. Does anyone else have this trouble? Every paragraph runs together, so I changed the colors to differentiate the paragraphs. I am not usually technically challenged...